When you’re dating in your 20s, the world is your oyster. Dating is really fun, there is no pressure… All young people you meet are free of baggage interfering with building laid-back romantic relationships. Still, once you hit your 40s, things start to change drastically.
Finding love in your 40s can be trickier, but once you understand how to navigate today’s dating scene, you can actually make an incredible experience.
Avoid Coming On Too Strong
You might have been through a lot and you want to skip over the BS part of your dating and get to the heart of it. But the core principles of dating still apply, no matter what age. This means that men don’t remember what you’re saying, they remember how you make them feel. So, if the guy feels that you’re grilling them on the first few dates and skipping over the most fun parts of your meetings like bantering, flirting, or playing dating cards, chances are they will quickly lose interest in dating altogether.
Don’t Wall Off Your Heart
According to one famous psychologist, ‘when we lose the ability to be vulnerable and close ourselves off to love, we also lose our ability to experience the joy that comes from relationships.’ It’s difficult to disagree with this statement. Your previous relationship might be far from ideal.
Divorce, toxic relationships, or even the untimely passing of your loved one can hurt your heart and make you want to shut off from potential relationships, either consciously or unconsciously. This is the last thing you want to do, though, if you want to experience the joy of healthy relationships again. Try your best to get back on that horse and open up your soul.
Be Clear About the Relationships You’re Looking For
People in their 40s tend to have a long list of things they know for sure they don’t want in their partner. Yet, the problem is they often fail to do enough work trying to understand the type of person they would love to build their relationship with.
You must create your love vision and get crystal clear about the person and the relationship you want. If you don’t have the bull’s eye, you’re doomed to miss every single time.
Don’t Be Idealistic
The best part about being a wise and experienced person is the ability to realistically access your chances of success. Lots of young girls tend to picture their ideal partner in full color and detail, up to their shoe size and haircut. Still, what was normal at a tender age might look like a fad in your 40s. With this in mind, you don’t want to limit too narrowly the type of person that you’re looking for.
There are slews of women who want to end up with a tall, suave CEO type driving a Maserati. If you get trapped in your inflated expectations, the odds are good you’ll have all those great qualities in a short, slightly balding IT specialist. So, make sure you don’t get overly specific when thinking about your ideal partner, and don’t focus on superficial things that have nothing to do with emotionally rewarding relationships.
Maximize Your Opportunities
Life can be hectic these days. So, you want to get the most out of every date and use every opportunity to its fullest. Say ‘yes’ to your guy’s invitations to fun events and parties, assuming you can be safe and comfortable in this particular environment. Also, respond to the compliments your date is tossing you and maintain eye contact. Be proactive and suggest other date ideas! This way, you’ll show your romantic interest that you enjoy spending time with them and speed up your bonding.
Be Flexible and Open-Minded
Let’s say you have a 14-year-old son, and you have sworn off wanting to raise other kids. But life is full of surprises. And you can meet a great person with a 5-year-old daughter. What are you going to do then? Chances are you’ll be open to it! Of course, you should have some deal-breakers and principles when it comes to building relationships.
Just be sure to be more flexible and open-minded. After all, people in their 40s already have their own lifestyles and behavior patterns. And to build a relationship that lasts, you need to respect your date’s peculiarities and be able to meet their needs to earn reciprocation.
